Product Telemetry Studio
Event grammar, client versus server capture, and a working dictionary your engineers will actually open. The house programme.
Storage Vectorcore · United Kingdom
Keep the numbers honest enough to ship by.
We teach App Analytics as a desk craft, not a dashboard tour. Teams leave with event names that survive a redesign, funnels that fail loudly, and retention curves they can read aloud in a product review without flinching.
Journal 04
“If the event cannot be named in a sentence a designer would accept, it is not ready to live in production.”From the Vectorcore Event Taxonomy
11studio cohorts since the desk opened
2,847production events reviewed in critique
19United Kingdom product teams hosted
6 wkstypical span to a defensible first dictionary
On the desk this season
Programmes with a syllabus, not a slide deck.
Four rooms. One flagship with a public syllabus. The others are run as closed ateliers — write if a seat would serve your stack.
Retention as a Narrative
Cohort curves, return windows, and the habit of writing what a dip actually meant. Syllabus released to seated teams.
Attribution After the Cookie
App-to-web joins, SKAN humility, and reporting that does not pretend the click is the whole story.
Experiment Readouts for Product Leads
How to sit with a noisy A/B, name the guardrails, and refuse a ship decision that the sample cannot carry.
How the desk teaches
Measurement is a literary problem that happens to use SQL.
We do not begin with a vendor screen. We begin with the sentence a teammate would use to describe a user doing a thing. If that sentence is sloppy, the warehouse will be sloppy, and the App Analytics stack will spend a year apologising for it.
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Name before you instrument
Every event is drafted in English, argued with design, then encoded. Properties are rationed. Identity rules are written down, not implied.
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Make failure visible
Funnels that swallow dropped steps are worse than no funnel. We teach checks, volume monitors, and the habit of publishing known gaps.
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Tell the retention story once
A curve without a caption is decoration. Cohorts are paired with a paragraph that a sceptical CPO could annotate.
From recent rooms
Voices, not slogans.
These notes refer to work that actually happened in the Studio and the Taxonomy desk.
The Event Grammar week was slower than I wanted. We spent an afternoon arguing about whether plan_selected and checkout_started were one moment or two. That argument later saved a broken onboarding funnel.
I came for dashboards and left with a dictionary in Notion that engineering still maintains. The Studio is particular. If you want a tool tour, this is the wrong house.
★★★★☆
Taxonomy critique was the piece I still use. The retention module assumed more SQL comfort than our PM group had; we paired with an analyst after week five and it settled.
A seat, not a funnel
Write to the desk if the work sounds like yours.
Fees are published. There is no checkout here — only a conversation about cohort dates, stack, and whether the Studio is the right room.